


The Worst Group Chat

by LiquoriceHatingDropje



Category: The Worst Witch (TV 1998), The Worst Witch (TV 2017), The Worst Witch - All Media Types
Genre: F/F, F/M, Gen, Harry Potter References, Hicsqueak, No hackle. Ever. Srry:), kinda? yeah, no one is going to die here I promise
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-17
Updated: 2020-11-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:14:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27608165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LiquoriceHatingDropje/pseuds/LiquoriceHatingDropje
Summary: Mildred makes a group chat and well...
Comments: 6
Kudos: 26





	1. I don’t know either bro

**Author's Note:**

> Don’t even ask. I think I read something similar to this a while ago, but for Narnia or something? So if you know who to credit just say hihi
> 
> I used curse words.. so :) yeah just so u know. They ARE mostly teenagers after all eh

_**Mildred** added **Maud Spellbody** and **28** others to the chat_

**Mildred** : Hi guys!

_**Mildred** changed name to **ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv**_

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : I’m bored

**Ethel** **Hallow** : K

_**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** changed **Ethel Hallow** ’s name to **FemaleDracoMalfoy**_

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : Who tf is Draco Malfoy

**Azura Moon** : HAAHH good one Millie

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : I know :)

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : ...

_**User3927838293** changed **Azura Moon** ’s name to **mymumruinedHicsqueak**_

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : Who tf r u?

**mymumruinedHicsqueak** : ...What did my mum do to you :/

**User3927838293** : I’m the author

**Enid Nightshade** : what fucking author?

_  
  
_ **User3927838293** _left the chat_

**Enid** **Nightshade** : Chile anyways so-

**Enid** **Nightshade** : Maud do you have the homework? I forgot lolz

**Maud Spellbody** : :|

_**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** changed **Maud Spellbody** ’s name to **HermioneGranger2.0**_

_**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** changed **Enid Nightshade** ’s name to **BitchWhoLeftUsForSports**_

**BitchWhoLeftUsForSports** : Rude.

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : It’s true

**BitchWhoLeftUsForSports** : Not my fault I have talents and you don’t

**Dimity Drill** : OOP- I-

_**BitchWhoLeftUsForSports** changed name to **TalentedASF**_

**TalentedASF** : better

**Hecate** **Hardbroom** : Pippa Pig oink oink

**Ada** **Cackle** : Hecate?

**HermioneGranger2.0** : I think my brain just committed suicide.

**Dimity Drill** : Miss gurrrll HAHAHAHH

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : what??????:))))))

**Hecate Hardbroom** : Fuck

**Hecate Hardbroom** : Wrong chat

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : WHAT THE HELL WAS THE GOOD CHAT??

**Pippa Pentangle** : :)

**TalentedASF** : Wait

**TalentedASF** : Pippa... pig

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : LMFAOOO I CANT-

**Indigo Moon** : kinky

**mymumruinedHicsqueak** : MUM WTF

**mymumruinedHicsqueak** : I need holy water

**Izzy Jones** : I just read everything. What in the abracadabra magical world. I’m so confused

**HermioneGranger2.0** : I‘m going to jump out my window

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : I‘m coming

**TalentedASF** : me too

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : please do :) all of you

**Ada Cackle** : Ethel Hallow! Can you come to my office pls? For wishing DEATH on someone?

**Felicity Foxglove** : ...

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : ...

**Dimity Drill** : ...

**Izzy Jones** : ...

**TalentedASF** : ...

_**Dimity Drill** removed **Ada Cackle** from the chat_

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : tnx

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : lol wtf

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : best teacher ever

_**Dimity Drill** changed name to **BestTeacherEver**_

**BestTeacherEver** : say that again in front of **@Hecate** **Hardbroom** tomorrow

**Hecate Hardbroom** : No

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : ...wait ur username I-

**BestTeacherEver** : I know I know it’s perfect

_**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** changed **Hecate Hardbroom** ’s name to **SolidFloorbrush**_

**SolidFloorbrush** : I don’t understand the name

_**User3927838293** entered the chat by magic because no one added them_

**User3927838293** : They’re synonymes for ur name you utter dimbo

**SolidFloorbrush** : and you are?

**User3927838293** : the author:)

**User3927838293** : end of chapter

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : what??

**User3927838293** : I said END OF CHAPTER


	2. How do you name chapters :(

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv = Mildred Hubble  
> FemaleDracoMalfoy = Ethel Hallow  
> HermioneGranger2.0 = Maud Spellbody   
> TalentedASF: Enid Nightshade   
> GayForPentangle: Felicity Foxglove (lol)  
> MymumruinedHicsqueak = Azura Moon  
> SolidFloorbrush = Hecate Hardbroom   
> User3927838293 = me
> 
> Later: 
> 
> PePpErCoRn = Izzy Jones (the writers of tww first wanted to name her Izzy Peppercorn)  
> Mabel Tapioca = Mymumcantcook   
> Crybaby = Sybil Hallow  
> Irrelevant = Beatrice Bunch  
> HermioneGranger3.0 = Clarice Twigg  
> HermioneGranger4.0 = Esmeralda Hallow
> 
> And the rest speaks for itself

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : omg

**TalentedASF** : whatt

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : ??

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : Do you remember last year???

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : If this is an attempt to make me feel guilty again istg-

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : ... no. But I can do that too

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : So remember Ethel letting Agatha out of the painting and then Agatha almost killing the whole school? :)

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : not again

**GayForPentangle** : I remember :) and when Ethel made me do a spell so your spell would go wrong and me accidentally turning Miss Cackle into glass. :/

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : IM SORRY FLISS I TOLD YOU ALREADY

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : anyways, Agatha went to vanishment right?

**HermioneGranger2.0** : she did

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : So... she got recycled right?

**HermioneGranger2.0** : yes

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : what about it?

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : Into... magic equipments?

**HermioneGranger2.0** : ...yes

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : surprised you can remember

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : or are you reading it from a book

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : as a matter of fact I am. Actually. But that doesn’t matter. Does this mean that our cauldrons can be partly Agatha? And the potion bottles...

**Izzy Jones** : Thats disgusting

**MymumruinedHicsqueak** : GROSS

**SolidFloorbrush** : Miss Hubble, I would like that you stop with this information, before I throw up:)

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : So we drink out of things.. made from Agatha’s dead body

**HermioneGranger2.0** : I’ve never been more disgusted by a thought in my life.

**HermioneGranger2.0** : ...And I’ve thought of Miss Tapiocas food before so thats a record

**Miss Tapioca** : Ehm? I provide you food everyday, so you don’t starve to death. The least I expect is a little bit respect.

**Mabel Tapioca** : did you just disrespect my mum like that I- big mood. But also. She CAN cook.

_**Mabel Tapioca** changed name to **Mymumcancook**_

_**HermioneGranger2.0** changed **Mymumcancook** ’s name to **Mymumcantcook**_

_**Miss Tapioca** left the chat_

**Mymumcantcook** : now you made her mad

**HermioneGranger2.0** : well she made me throw up once :) so idrc

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : bruh same

**Sybil Hallow** : same :(

**Beatrice Bunch** : lol she can cook. But it won’t be good when Miss Cackle gives her a budget of £200 PER DAY FOR 300 CHILDREN

**Ada Cackle** : oops

**SolidFloorbrush** : ADA

**Pippa Pentangle** : WHAT

**Ada Cackle** : sorry :(

_**User3927838293** deleted **Ada Cackle** from the chat_

**User3927838293** : lol

**User3927838293** : I hate that woman

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : same. I like you random person I don’t know. Lets be friends.

**User3927838293** : no

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : nvm I don’t like you

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : AHHAHAH OOP ETHEL REJECTED

**User3927838293** : that goes for you too, Mildred

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : nvm I like you again

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : bruh

_**User3927838293** changed **Izzy Jones** name to **PePpErCoRn**_

_**User3927838293** changed **Beatrice Bunch** ’s name to **Irrelevant**_

_**User3927838293** changed **Clarice Twigg** ’s name to **HermioneGranger3.0**_

_**User3927838293** changed **Sybil Hallow** ’s name to **Crybaby**_

_**User3927838293** changed **Esmeralda Hallow** ’s name to **HermioneGranger4.0**_

**PePpErCoRn** : I don’t get it

**Irrelevant** : HOW RUDE.

**HermioneGranger3.0** : Who is Hermione Granger? I don’t think I’ve read or heard about her before

**HermioneGranger4.0** : Oh Harry Potter! I love those books! And Hermione too

**Crybaby** : IM NOT A CRYBABY WHY DOES EVERYONE SAY THAT

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : you are tho

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : but we love you for it

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : tf no we don’t

**HermioneGranger4.0** : Don’t listen to Ethel Sybie we luv u

**HermioneGranger3.0** : she’s crying now

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : lmfao mood

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : me everyday:

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : Ethel you good?

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : lol no, why d’you ask?

**User3927838293** : wait stop. Im not good at writing feelings.

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : huh?

**User3927838293** : end of chapter :) srry


	3. Nope still don’t know a name

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SolidFloorbrush = Miss Hardbroom 
> 
> PePpErCoRn = Izzy Jones
> 
> TalentedASF = Enid Nightshade
> 
> HermioneGranger3.0 = Clarice Twigg
> 
> Crybaby = Sybil Hallow
> 
> MymumruinedHicsqueak = Azura Moon
> 
> Author/ User3927838293 = Me :)
> 
> ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv = Mildred Hubble
> 
> Irrelevant = Beatrice Bunch
> 
> BestTeacherEver = Dimity Drill
> 
> HermioneGranger4.0 = Esmeralda Hallow 
> 
> FemaleDracoMalfoy = Ethel Hallow
> 
> Pippa Pentangle = Pippa Pentangle (I know right, so unexpected)

**SolidFloorbrush** : Excuse me, but all fifth years are supposed to be in the potions classroom right now. I see absolutely no one. Can someone explain?

**PePpErCoRn** : Oop- Well I have a free period rn so imma stay here for the tea

**TalentedASF** : OH this is going to be FUN

**HermioneGranger3.0** : I saw them.

**Crybaby** : CLARICE

**HermioneGranger3.0** : But it’s true!

_**Crybaby** removed **HermioneGranger3.0** from the chat_

**Crybaby** : Ill put her back when this is over

**SolidFloorbrush** : ... I still need answers

**MymumruinedHicsqueak** : I heard them say something about studying in the library

**MymumruinedHicsqueak** : not sure tho

**MymumruinedHicsqueak** : :)

**SolidFloorbrush** : I just looked, they aren’t there

**Crybaby** : wait how’d you do that so fast?

_**User3927838293** changed name to **Author**_

**Author** : She can transfer idiot

**Crybaby** : ohhh

**Crybaby** : I forgot

**Author** : HB can you teach me magic? :)

**SolidFloorbrush** : no ‘:)’

_**SolidFloorbrush** removed **Author** from the chat_

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : WERE SO GOOD AT THIS AHAHAHA

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : Wait. Frick. Wrong chat. Act like you didn’t see.

**Crybaby** : Whaaaaat

**Crybaby** : Omg Miss Hardbroom you’d never guess what I saw

**Crybaby** : a baby pigeon! Trying to jump from the roof!

**Irrelevant** : Yeahhh I saw it too! Sooo cool :)

**Crybaby** : K lets place a bet

**Crybaby** : Is he trying to kill himself or trying to fly

**Crybaby** : I think the first

**Irrelevant** : HAHAHA yeah def

**Crybaby** : bc mood

**SolidFloorbrush** : **@ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** Come here this instant. I know you are reading this. And I will not hesitate to give you a detention.

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : Well your going to give me detention anyways so whats the fun in coming?

**TalentedASF** : I- GO BESTFREND GO BESTFREND

**TalentedASF** : taught u well.

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : :)) yes

**SolidFloorbrush** : **@Ada Cackle** ! Say something

**PePpErCoRn** : Miss Drill kicked her from the chat Miss

**PePpErCoRn** : LMFAO

**SolidFloorbrush** : K Drill 10 points for that..

**BestTeacherEver** : Thanks girly

**SolidFloorbrush** : Don’t call me that

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : GIRLY

**TalentedASF** : GIRLYYY GURL

**HermioneGranger4.0** : whats going on? Why’s the chat blowing up

**HermioneGranger4.0** : oh wait

**HermioneGranger4.** 0: this is hilarious

**HermioneGranger4.0** : GIRLYYY

**HermioneGranger4.0** : GURL

**HermioneGranger4.0** : Girly

**SolidFloorbrush** : Detention.

**SolidFloorbrush** : ALL OF YOU

**HermioneGranger4.0** : I don’t go to Cackle’s anymore lolz

**TalentedASF** : same.

**BestTeacherEver** : and I’m a teacher

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : You’re going to give me detention anyways

**SolidFloorbrush** : Remind me why I became a teacher again

**TalentedASF** : bc you were an idiot child and got yourself locked up in the school. So you had to make a choice of becoming a lonely old woman with no friends and no job, or a lonely old woman with no friends and a job. Easy decision.

**PePpErCoRn** : OMG YOU HAVE NO FILTER

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : ENID!

**BestTeacherEver** : I AM GOING TO CRY. ENID YOU REALLY JUST DID THAT.

**HermioneGranger4.0** : Well then. This is going to be interesting.

**SolidFloorbrush** : . It wasnt a question someone was supposed to answer. Dear Merlin, please have mercy.

**TalentedASF** : Its the praying to Merlin for me

**BestTeacherEver** : PFFFFT ENID

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : NIGHTSHADE

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : Ethel? But you’re supposed to be doing.. ya know

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : we’re all done!

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : seriously? This fast?

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : Yes ma’am. We had good help.

**Pippa Pentangle** : :)))

**Pippa Pentangle** : Hecate dear, can you come to the great hall please?

**SolidFloorbrush** : Why?

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : JUST GO WOMAN

**SolidFloorbrush** : ok

**SolidFloorbrush** : wait, what’s all the noise about?

**Pippa Pentangle** : BE QUIET YOU GUYS!

**FemaleDracoMalfoy** : srry

**TalentedASF** : HELLO WHATS GOING ON IM NOT HERE WITH YOU.

**TalentedASF** : SOMEONE NEEDS TO INFORM ME OF THE TEAAAAAA HELLO???

**TalentedASF** : IS NO ONE HERE GOING TO TELL ME ANYTHING?

**TalentedASF** : OMG PLEASE TELL ME SOMEONE DIED OR SUM

**TalentedASF** : wait no actually don’t

**TalentedASF** : would make a cool story tho

**ImTheSchoolSaviorLuv** : We surprised HB with a birthday party!

**PePpErCoRn** : She fainted...

**MymumruinedHicsqueak** : Yeah Maybe we shouldn’t have all appeared in front of her at the same time..

**Pippa Pentangle** : We really shouldn’t have.. oh well. It is lots of fun!

**SolidFloorbrush** : Hmm yeah it is

**SolidFloorbrush** : thank you all

**HermioneGranger2.0** : No problem!

**TalentedASF** : Its the not inviting me for me

**HermioneGranger4.0** : I agree with Enid! I should’ve been there

**Author** : I don’t feel like typing more things

**TalentedASF** : when did you get back in the chat

**Author** : idk did it myself? Lol idk bruh mind your own business

**TalentedASF** : wow srry didn’t know you’d get mad

**Author** : end of chapter. Oh and have a nice b-day Hecate!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked.. whatever this was.  
> I wrote this at 1 am soo..

**Author's Note:**

> Its me. I‘m the author. 
> 
> ..Well I tell you what Sherlock Holmes, you are unbelievable


End file.
